Squash Your Jealousy

When Somebody Else Succeeds—and You Don’t

            I know how it feels. You have a hope and a dream, and you’re approaching it cautiously. You’re just kind of figuring it out as you go, plotting and planning. Taking your time. Whether your book is fiction or non-fiction, or something else, you’ve got it on a nice, steady simmer, and you are carefully putting the pieces together. It might take a little time, but when it’s done—this book is going to be stellar!

            Then you make the mistake of looking up the news from your hometown. Your old classmate is in it. “Local High School Alum Writes National Bestseller.”

Your heart sinks.

But what if the news is even worse? What if the book is on the same subject as your book? A thought comes to a rapid boil inside your head.

            Well, good for you.

And it’s not a happy bubbling.

Then you feel guilty. You’re not supposed to be jealous of another’s success; that’s looked upon as secretly being mean or spiteful. Jealousy won’t do you any good, anyway. It will eat you up inside.

I, however, think it’s a little more than just jealousy. It could just be you beating yourself up. Here are some fabulous ways you can rip yourself apart:

“Why didn’t I get a move-on, and finish that book a long time ago?”

“NO-O-O-O! Somebody already wrote the book I was supposed to write!”

And here’s the worst feeling:

“Great. Now there’s no room left for me. I missed my chance—forever.”

So, this paralyzes you with depression. Your desire to write has gone out with the trash. There’s no point in going on. This limelight-hogging author has stolen your identity as a writer on your subject! Is there anything you can do to get past this and reclaim who you are and once again do what you want to do?

Well, you could change how you think about this event. There are several ways you can look upon this situation:

  1. First of all, if somebody from your hometown has found crazy success with writing a book, then here’s a new thought: “If So-and-So can do it, then maybe I can, too!”
  2. “Maybe this person has paved the way for me! I wonder if I could get a little help and advice from this new author from my old school.”
  3. How about this for a stunner: “Congratulations! Could you sign my copy of your book? Say… How would you like to write your next book with me? It could be so much fun. A new challenge! Whaddaya say, ol’ buddy, ol’ pal?”
  4. Here’s my favorite: “Wow, when I become a bestselling author, too, just think of the headlines I’ll make! Kind of like “Lightning Strikes Twice in the Same Town!”

            Now, we can just continue to struggle along by ourselves if we want, and that’s perfectly fine. We don’t have to follow any of these new directions. We could instead use this as a non-fiction writer would use it in a book proposal, and this tactic works for fiction, as well. Remember: publishers want to see that there’s a market for this subject. If one author has succeeded with it, then another author should have no problem convincing an agent that your book will succeed, too. Just be sure to give your book a little unique twist of some kind.

            Once you finish your book and get it published, here is a parting thought, and I don’t want you to feel guilty about it; just feel reassured:

            You will probably make somebody else jealous.

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